What would an AL and NL All-Star team band look like?

Now that the starting lineups for the AL and NL All-Star teams have been announced, it's time to answer the question that everyone is asking. No, not which starting lineup is stronger or would fare better in intergalactic warfare, but what each team would look like if they decided to form a band. Obviously. 

Here's how they stack up: 

Derek Jeter and the American League Nine

Genre: Soft Jazz Fusion

Likely Name of Their First Album: Too Handsome to Quit, Too Smooth to Die

The American League team doesn't want to rock your faces off. Rather, they want to provide you with the smooth grooves that are perfect for both a Sunday brunch with the family or a romantic date at home. The band is known for their legendary live shows where they'll keep on laying down those smooth beats until long after everyone has fled the arena. 

Vocals: Adam Jones

Jones leads the band with a velvety voice, smooth dance moves and an ability to charm every member of the audience with his dazzling smile.  

Lead Guitar: Derek Jeter

Jeter's guitar lines are smooth and pleasant while remaining intricate and complex. He's the baseball version of Carlos Santana. And while he's known for his icy blue coolness, his encores are always red hot. 

Rhythm Guitar: Jose Bautista

The band prefers the term "co-lead guitarist." While Bautista takes fewer solos, he brings plenty of energy and power to the band with his short, direct approach to chord progressions. When the band wants to bring the house down, they ask Bautista to turn it up. 

Synth: Mike Trout

Trout brings a little '80s New Wave tinge to the band. Because doesn't he just look like a dude who is secretly obsessed with Duran Duran? (But who isn't?)

Bass: Nelson Cruz

For Cruz, only one thing matches the sensation of blasting baseballs out of the park: the thundering low-end of the bass. Cruz's deep bass grooves add an funky undertone to the group's sound. 

Drums: Matt Wieters

In many ways, the drummer is a lot like a catcher. They sit in the back, are partially obscured from view and help set the pace and tempo. Though Wieters is being replaced by Salvador Perez for the upcoming tour, the band is in good hands with either drummer. 

Saxophone: Miguel Cabrera

Seriously, it just fits. Can you imagine Miguel Cabrera playing another instrument? 

Trumpet: Robinson Cano

With power and finesse, Cano's energetic blasts of bright and cheery horns get fans onto the dance floor every night. 

Clarinet: Josh Donaldson

You've never heard a clarinet solo until you've heard a Josh Donaldson clarinet solo. 

The National League Good Time Family Fun Band

Genre: Party rock

Likely Name of their First Album: The Thunderous Applause from Castle Hijinx

Mixing the let's-party-forever vibe of Andrew WK with disco-inspired rock n' roll, the National League are all about having a good time and working up a sweat on the dance floor. 

Vocals: Troy Tulowitzki

If his old mullet wasn't enough, his embrace of both Miley Cyrus' "Party in the USA" and Ace of Base's "The Sign" is proof positive that Tulowitzki was born to lead this group. 

Lead Guitar: Andrew McCutchen

With his flowing locks and energetic attitude, McCutchen is a natural lead guitarist. Prepare to have your face melted off when he and Tulo do their patented sing-offs to end the night. 

Rhythm Guitar: Chase Utley

While the band likes to tear it up, they still need someone to hold all the pieces together. Just as Utley has been a steadying force in the Phillies lineup for the last decade, Utley plays that part for this group. 

Bass: Yadier Molina

An artist behind the plate and behind the four string, Molina brings an astonishing amount of technical skill and songcraft to his bass playing. 

Drums: Yasiel Puig 

With energy and swagger, Puig provides an infectious dance beat. His drum solos have been known to bring Vin Scully to tears. 

Keyboard: Aramis Ramirez

If there's one thing that Aramis Ramirez knows, it's how to hit home runs. If there's another, it's the keyboard stylings of Billy Joel. 

Saxophone: Carlos Gomez

Carlos Gomez once played the saxophone so well, Kenny G offered to quit right then and there. Instead, the two got together and had a cookout. 

Flute: Paul Goldschmidt

Think a party band can't have a flute? Think again. You've never heard a flute rock this hard. And that includes Jethro Tull. 

And while the Final Vote candidates will not be competing against each other in an American Idol-type singoff, your vote will decide who gets to go to the All-Star Game. Click here to vote now.