Bartolo Colon brings joy (and bubble gum) to us all

OK, that headline may have been slightly misleading. While Bartolo Colon certainly does bring joy to all of us in the form of his career-high hit total, his phenomenal fielding skills and his record-setting scoreless inning streak, you really only got the bubble gum if you happened to be in the Mets' dugout during Friday's game against the Braves:

But don't worry -- all you have to do to get in on this is get drafted by the Mets, work your way up through the Minors, then get called up to the Show and wait. Sure, that might take a while, but you know there's still a reasonably good chance you'll retire before Bartolo does.