Bidets make debut as Sox sweep AL champs at home

This story was excerpted from Scott Merkin’s White Sox Beat newsletter. To read the full newsletter, click here. And subscribe to get it regularly in your inbox.

CHICAGO – I posed an important question to Munetaka Murakami following his first career home run in Chicago on Saturday afternoon. It also was a question featuring one caveat.

After he answered my inquiry, coming on the heels of a 6-3 victory over the Blue Jays, and with the help of interpreter Kenzo Yagi, I would never broach this topic again. So, what was the all-important subject matter?

Bidets, of course. I mean, what else could it be?

Here’s a quick rundown for those who haven’t followed this bathroom-related storyline over the past four months. Murakami, 26, joined the White Sox on a two-year, $34 million free-agent deal and one of the initial requests made by the power hitter from Japan was to add bidets to the home clubhouse after first touring Rate Field.

There was excitement, but uncertainty, from fellow White Sox players, with right-hander Davis Martin humorously wondering if the bidet would belong to Murakami or would there be multiple installed. Then, from the moment of truth, those much-ballyhooed bidets were in place when the White Sox returned to Chicago on Friday following a 1-5 road trip.

“There are four. There’s not just Mune’s. We have four,” said a smiling Martin of the latest impact addition to the White Sox clubhouse. “We’ll see if he likes one more than another and we [can] kind of adjust for him.”

“Oh, yeah. They are nice,” said outfielder Tristan Peters with a laugh, the same Peters who delivered a home opener walk-off single against the Blue Jays. “The seat warmer is a bit weird at first, but I’ll get used to it.”

Knowing I was going to be off for last week’s Marlins’ series in Florida, I followed the proper protocol to get an early look at the bidets. I just wanted to get a picture, receiving the green light from general manager Chris Getz and home clubhouse manager Rob Warren.

Both laughed and looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the idea. It wasn’t the first time someone thought that of me, and it won’t be the last. I traveled to Rate Field on Tuesday, also picking up my parking pass, but to my great sadness, I wasn’t escorted into the clubhouse to see these newest franchise icons.

A picture was still sent my way, which I posted to my X account on Friday evening. I didn’t think White Sox fans would be enthralled with bidet news during a losing streak, so I waited for a little fervor to return.

As of this newsletter, that image received 2.2 million views, almost 1,200 likes, 44 bookmarks, 28 quotes and over 150 reposts. One of the reporters from Japan, who all do such an exceptional job covering Murakami and the White Sox, asked me how I got the picture. I told him the White Sox sent me the image, because nobody covers baseball bidets as I do. He told me it had become a big story in Japan.

One member of the White Sox front office staff suggested the bidets might be on the cover of the media guide next year. I’m 99.9 percent sure it was a joke. Meanwhile, the White Sox players provided rave reviews.

“They are legit,” right-hander Sean Burke said. “I can fully understand how they are working now. I have all those buttons, and everything situated. When I first got in, I forgot they were in there. You open the stall, and the toilet pops up and everything. It’s cool.”

“Everybody in here has tried it,” Martin said. “It’s been a really funny bonding experience. Everybody is having conversations I don’t think they were really expecting to have this time last year. Brings the team closer together, and it does work well.”

At this point, people might be wondering what the point is behind this story, aside from wonderment as to why bidet companies haven’t offered sponsorship deals to Murakami, the White Sox and even myself. And there is a clear-cut point I’ve made before.

Murakami has changed the White Sox. He has brought a talented left-handed power bat into the lineup, with a patient approach and a tireless work ethic. His addition opened the Pacific Rim for the organization, where it had precious little presence since Tadahito Iguchi and Shingo Takatsu from the ’05 World Series championship season.

They have become an international story in a positive way. The focus over the last three seasons seemed to be 100-plus losses and a hope for Getz’s plan to work.

We can’t close without bidet thoughts from Murakami, the Rate Field originator of this phenomenon, who laughed after Yagi presented my question.

“It’s wonderful,” Murakami said.

Those words pretty much represent the White Sox feelings on their new first baseman. Murakami is the biggest signing within this current rebuild, and the White Sox have made him feel at home.