Adrian Gonzalez actually raced a radio host who called him slow
We're all familiar with "The Tortoise and the Hare," right? The tortoise gets sick of hearing the hare talk about how fast he is all the time and tells him to put up or shut up. Well, this fable is called "The Dodgers First Baseman and the Radio Host" and the ending is a little different than you might expect.
David Vassegh, co-host of Dodger Talk, makes fun of Adrian Gonzalez's lack of foot speed a lot. So, like the tortoise, Gonzalez asked Vassegh to put his money where his mouth was and challenged him to a race.
But unlike the tortoise, Gonzalez was straight-up just way faster than his competitor:
Since this is a fable, there's a moral here: Slow and steady? Come on, professional athletes always win the race.
H/T: SB Nation