Joe Maddon's new restaurant opens to rave review, sadly lacks baseball-themed dishes

Joe Maddon may be in Chicago now, but he left something behind in Florida. Namely, his new upscale Italian eatery, Ava.

The restaurant, which officially opened in the SoHo area earlier this month, recently received a rave review from the Tampa Bay Times. The Times highlighted their pizzas as "the anchor" of the menu, but also noted the salumi plate and the "short lineup of tremendous cocktails devised by bar manager Tommy Simms."

Unfortunately that means the restaurant appears to be a high-class joint focused on making delicious foods in a warm and inviting atmosphere instead of the Uncle Baseball's Eat N' Slurp that I was hoping for. (Of course, this is Joe Maddon that we're talking about. I can't imagine him opening anything with the word "Slurp" in the title.) 

That also means that we won't be seeing any of these items on the menu. Which is a real shame: 

- Alex Cobb Salad

- Brad Boxburger

- Curt Casalinguine

- Tampa Bay BRays-ed lamb

- Ernesto Wood-Frieri'd Pizza

- Spaghetti in a Jake Pomodorizzi sauce

And even if Maddon does expand with a Chicago location, I highly doubt we're going to see: 

- Anthony Rizzoto

- Aged Parmigiano-Justin Ruggiano Cheese

- Tommy La Stelline

- Beef Welington Castillo

- Jason BecHammel sauce

- Jake Arriosticini

However, if anyone would like to open an Uncle Baseball's Eat N' Slurp, these ideas are free for you to use. You're welcome.