Citizens of the world, rejoice: Jon Lester's search for his first hit has finally come to an end

As of today, Jon Lester has been a Major League baseball player for 3,314 days (bless you, Internet). He's done a lot of things during that time, most of them very good -- like winning two World Series, or making three All-Star appearances, or being likened to Marilyn Monroe. But there is one thing that has eluded him, the white whale to his Captain Ahab: In 66 at-bats, Jon Lester had never recorded a hit.

His futility at the plate had taken on its own kind of beauty, a statistical void so pure that no value dared enter. Gaze upon his MLB.com player page, which definitely belongs on a reddit thread:

But alas, the drama of "Waiting for Lester: The Existential Nothingness of Pitchers Hitting" arrived at its final act during Monday's Cardinals-Cubs game. With two on in the second, the lefty came to the plate against John Lackey and struck a blow against the abyss:

And, along with its historical significance, Lester's hit was foretold by his family. In a bit of pre-game repartee on "Intentional Talk," the Lesters and Lackeys -- who, we should point out, are good friends -- made some bold claims about the upcoming matchup.

Lester's wife Farrah:

OK, so maybe the home run prediction was a little off. But still.

Add in his struggle to conquer throwing the ball to first, and this season has been Jon Lester's Everest.