Greg Bird announced he had joined Twitter by tweeting us his entire life's story
Greg Bird joins Twitter and tells his life's story
There are few moments more nerve-wracking than making an inaugural tweet. Sure, it's only 140 characters, but it's your first 140 characters. It's a way to say hello to the world, to show everyone who you really are. The options are endless: You could play it cool, or funny, or earnest.
Or, you could do what Greg Bird did, and just take a few minutes to tell everyone your life's story. Like, your entire life's story:
Because I got off to a late start on here I'll fill you guys in on what you missed....- Greg Bird (@_GBIRD33) December 3, 2015
I started out hitting...soccer balls...when I was little... pic.twitter.com/iQPO8HkEMr- Greg Bird (@_GBIRD33) December 3, 2015
What followed was the entire Saga of Bird, from childhood to the present day. From early triumphs ...
... to cross-country travels:
Where he would eventually meet up with another future Major Leaguer:
And then: pinstripes:
But don't worry, we're still in the "rising action" portion of the program. There were many Minor League stops ahead:
Bird wisely avoided any apple emoji confusion and opted for a simple photo:
...a couple flights and a few bus rides later I was in the.... pic.twitter.com/or7OHNlTWp- Greg Bird (@_GBIRD33) December 3, 2015
As in all great coming-of-age tales, it's important to end on a high note:
Most importantly, though, he remembered the profile picture -- as long as you aren't an egg, you'll do just fine.