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Greg Bird announced he had joined Twitter by tweeting us his entire life's story

Greg Bird joins Twitter and tells his life's story

By Chris Landers

There are few moments more nerve-wracking than making an inaugural tweet. Sure, it's only 140 characters, but it's your first 140 characters. It's a way to say hello to the world, to show everyone who you really are. The options are endless: You could play it cool, or funny, or earnest.

Or, you could do what Greg Bird did, and just take a few minutes to tell everyone your life's story. Like, your entire life's story:

 

What followed was the entire Saga of Bird, from childhood to the present day. From early triumphs ...

 

... to cross-country travels:

 

Where he would eventually meet up with another future Major Leaguer:

 

And then: pinstripes:

 

But don't worry, we're still in the "rising action" portion of the program. There were many Minor League stops ahead:

 

 

 

 

Bird wisely avoided any apple emoji confusion and opted for a simple photo:

 

As in all great coming-of-age tales, it's important to end on a high note:

 

Most importantly, though, he remembered the profile picture -- as long as you aren't an egg, you'll do just fine. 

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