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Alex Guerrero singled thanks to one of the strangest ground balls you will ever see

Atlanta first baseman Joey Terdoslavich probably thought he had a routine out when Alex Guerrero squibbed a soft ground ball his way. Oh, Joey. Joey, Joey, Joey.

What could have prepared you? You were but a pawn in something far more sinister, something far bigger than just one player or just one game. Lurking in the shadows, the Dodgers waited, anticipating the perfect moment to make their plans known. And then, on Monday, they struck -- and revealed their fleet of sentient baseballs, designed to foil the best efforts of any opponents. You never had a chance. 

COME, MY MINIONS. RISE:

Alex Guerrero grounder

We're no physics majors, but we're fairly confident that inanimate objects aren't allowed to just say, "Nah, I'm good over here actually, thanks."