Alfredo Simon throws two eephus pitches in one at-bat to Torii Hunter, gets the out

I don't know what it is about Torii Hunter, but like the pavement and an ice cream cone, he seems to attract eephus pitches. After all, you surely remember the time that Yu Darvish broke his brain with an eephus last spring: 

So when Hunter came to the plate to face Alfredo Simon in the third inning of Tuesday's Twins-Tigers game, Simon knew what he had to do. After starting Hunter with a 61-mph eephus, he followed it up with what must have seemed like an 84-mph laser beam. Or, as the starter put it: 

Even after crossing Hunter up, Simon wouldn't throw a second eephus (or "slow split" as Simon calls the pitch) in the span of one at-bat, right? While Simon is second only to Odrisamer Despaigne in tossing the inspiration for Modest Mouse's biggest hit*,  he surely knows that one 60-mph floater may surprise a batter, but a second is practically begging for it to be hit out of the park ... right? 

Apparently Simon doesn't believe in that kind of negative thinking. So, the right-hander threw a 63-mph balloon and all Hunter could do was pop out. 

After the game, Simon basically admitted that he was practically toying wth the Twins' outfielder: 

Already known as one of the last pitchers with a screwball, Simons says he's quite comfortable with the pitch.

While the floater was pretty, it is not the best that has ever been tossed. No, that title is shared between Dave LaRoche: 

And former Cubs ace Henry Rowengartner: 

*Wait, you're saying "Float On" isn't about eephus pitches?