Brandon Phillips got these ridiculous Louboutin sneakers for Shane Victorino, and we have a ton of questions

Evidently, newly acquired Red Sox outfielder Shane Victorino is a sneaker hound. We know this because he tweeted out the above picture of a pair of red, spiked Christian Louboutins that Reds second baseman Brandon Phillips got for him. While these are clearly a wonderful gift, they've also raised about a million questions, namely:

• Are they really a gift for Victorino to wear?
• Does Louboutin even make men's sneakers?
• Is Victorino going to wear these to the club? The mall? The gym?
• Did Phillips come across these in the store and think, "Oh man. I've just GOT to get these for Shane!"
• Why did they come in what appears to be a very nice cloth bag? Is that how all rich-people shoes come?
• The shoes are size 6.5. There's no way the Flyin' Hawaiian's feet are that small, right? Right?
• Is the fact that they're red a taunt based on Cincinnati's team name? Or a show of support for Victorino's new team?
• Since the spikes are on the top, that makes them illegal to use as baseball cleats, yes?

-- Dakota Gardner / MLB.com