These Chase Utley life-sized bobbleheads are pure nightmare fuel

Tuesday was Chase Utley bobblehead night in Philadelphia. Normally such nights are celebrations -- both for the player being honored and the fans who get to bring home a souvenir. 

At first, nothing seemed out of the ordinary with 31,000 happy Phillies fans on hand to snag a bobblehead of their star second baseman. 

@pfvYMCA Chase Utley bobble head oh yeah! pic.twitter.com/Vl7VkEBYkK

- Michelle Ferretti (@meferretti) June 11, 2014

But that fun soon turned to terror when the cameras caught sight of these two life-sized bobbleheads:

Sure, the human bobblers look innocuous enough with their bulbous heads and goofy grins, but Utley was quickly reminded of his childhood nightmares that were filled with murderous bobbleheads: 

And while you may think such a fear sounds silly, just wait until tonight when you try to sleep. As you toss and turn in your bed, the wind moaning and the floorboards creaking, you'll hear that familiar plup plup plup sound of bobbling heads. You'll think you're just imagining it, that those are the sounds of the house settling, that there's no such thing as murderous baseball figurines. 

But then, by the light of the moon, you'll see those big, bright smiles illuminated and they won't look like teeth any more. No, now they're more like knives, sharpened and coming for your throat. 

And then those nightmares won't seem so silly ... will they?