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We stand in awe of Bartolo Colón's glorious birthday cake

What does your ideal birthday cake look like? Mine would just have a lot of chocolate and peanut butter with a very generous amount of whipped cream. The other details aren't super important.

When you're Bartolo Colón though, you can go all out -- as he did on Friday for his 46th. It's his first season out of professional baseball since 1993, so why not live it up? Vladimir Guerrero had a pretty cool cake for his 44th birthday earlier this year, but Colon topped it:

That is some high quality craftsmanship. Every single one of Colón's 11 teams are represented on the cake in chronological order, as well as his Dominican Winter League club, Águilas Cibaeñas. (Your move, Edwin Jackson.)

Please save us a slice, Bart.

Thank you kindly.