Enjoy your postseason, Nats, Bryce Harper's doing just fine spouting elite dad jokes at a pumpkin patch
Bryce Harper wanted to be playing in the postseason right now. He, the Phillies and their entire fan base had expectations for 2019 when he joined the team as a free agent.
It didn't go down that way in his first season in Philly, though. And, to make matters worse, Harper's former team, the Nats, moved on and made the postseason anyway, where they're currently battling the Dodgers in the Division Series.
But you know what? That doesn't really matter, because Harper, his wife Kayla and their newborn son Krew (yes, that's his real name) are having a fantastic time at their local pumpkin patch.
And -- I cannot stress this enough -- Harper's already an elite dad. Just look at this dad joke:
Get it? Pumpkin "patch," like a bandage? While he’s standing in an actual pumpkin patch? Do you get it? This man's barely had a month to even be a father, and he's already mastered dad jokes. He's a fast learner.
Bryce is out there living his best life right now.
This is a quality comic setup:
Kayla committed to the bit, too. You can't teach comic timing like that.
Adrian Garro joined MLB.com in 2016. Throughout his travels, both Bartolo Colon and Vin Scully have placed their hands on his shoulders. Not at the same time, though. That'd be amazing.