Celebrate David Ortiz's career with 10 of his best quotes
When David Ortiz retires at the end of the year, he will leave a giant chasm in the heart of the Red Sox's lineup, in each and every baseball fan's heart and, yes, in every postgame article. That's because Ortiz isn't just a fearsome slugger with his own unique style and entire merchandising wing -- he's also a human quote machine.
So, while we prepare to say goodbye, here are 10 of his greatest quotes. We know there are hundreds more, so be sure to leave your favorite in the comments.
When some suggested that players from a previous era wouldn't unleash the same bat flips Ortiz is known for after his massive home runs Ortiz bristled:
"People want to talk about old school. I am old school. How many [expletives] are in the game right now who played in 1997 in the big leagues?"
That answer, by the way, is two: Ortiz and
With Ortiz's career winding down, he's made sure that his son has been around the team as much as possible. But the two aren't just hanging out and getting into hilarious hijinks -- Ortiz is raising his son so he can take over the sport on his own.
"He's come to be one of us. He's getting familiar with the business. It's not just only on baseball, it's on everything. When your dad takes you around and you get used to it, it's just like having any other business. You're trying to teach your kid about the business, so when they grow up, they can run it."
"I just swing hard in case I hit it -- that's it."
That's worked out pretty well.
Ortiz struggled when he first joined the Red Sox, so his teammates jokingly referred to him as "Juan Pierre." Of course, the future years would reveal his true name: Big Papi.
Or ... is it?
"They call me Super Papi. That's right. Put it down like that. What else?"
After his good friend Tom Brady was suspended by the NFL, Ortiz offered this ... fact?
"When you fight eggs with a rock, the eggs never win."
Explaining how he honed his hitting abilities in the Dominican Republic, Ortiz stumbled upon the greatest truth of all time:
"Listen, bro: If you can hit a baby doll head with a broomstick, you can hit an inside cutter. You don't need a batting cage in the Dominican. You just have to love the game. And you need to be able to fight off your sister when she comes looking for her baby doll."
Some are born pessimists, always looking at the glass as half-empty. That's certainly not Ortiz:
"Yeah, I'm gonna have fun. It's who I am. I just hit a baseball 500 d--n feet. I grew up in the gutter and now I'm out here in front of the world living my dream and you all want me to feel sad? I can't do it. I'm here to bring joy to this game."
Ortiz has hit more than 500 home runs, won three World Series rings and has a good case as the greatest designated hitter to ever play the game. But when he thinks of his legacy, what is he worried about? Something a little more important than dingers.
Speaking about what he would want people to say to his children if they were to ever reach the big leagues, Ortiz said:
"If they ever get up here, I want people to say to them, 'I knew your dad, and he was a guy with huge power. But there was something better about him. He was a good person, a good guy.' That's what I care about the most."
After hitting a batting-practice home run that lodged itself in the Pesky Pole,Ortiz only had one description of the kind of person that could pull that off. Almost half of it is unable to be printed:
"You're only going to see a bad (expletive) like me doing that. You have to hit the (expletive) out of the ball for that (expletive) to happen."
Of course, the top moment could be none other. With the city of Boston in shock following the bombings at the Boston Marathon, the face of the Red Sox -- and therefore a representative of the city as a whole -- got a chance to say a few words. They were live, raw, unedited and became a rallying call for the entire region.
