The only way to announce you've written a memoir titled "Big Sexy" is by reading it on the treadmill
Announcements are big deals. Politicians spend weeks -- even months -- planning the perfect way to formally launch a campaign. The site, speech and press release all have to be perfect. The same goes for a movie launch trailer. Fans and media are going to dissect every last detail of every moment, so you have to make sure they are all thoughtfully considered.
On Wednesday, former Major League pitcher and cult hero Bartolo Colón announced that he has a memoir coming out in April, detailing his path from growing up picking coffee in the Dominican Republic to pitching 21 years in MLB. So, of course he announced it with a fully-orchestrated, hyped event, right?
Don't be silly. This is Big Sexy we're talking about here! He announced it by posting a video on Instagram of him reading his memoir -- Big Sexy: The Life and Times of Bartolo Colón -- on the treadmill:
Though there is little in the way of pomp and circumstance to Colón's announcement, it somehow perfectly captures what made him such a beloved player. Sure, it raises more questions than it answers -- why is he reading about his own life on the treadmill? Couldn't he have splurged for better lighting? But, really, why is he on a treadmill for this? -- but it's authentically Bartolo.
If 'Big Sexy' is anything like this announcement, it's going to be the must-read book of next summer.
Eric Chesterton is writer for Cut4. He particularly enjoys bunts against the shift, stolen bases and celebrating his birthday with mascots at the ballpark.