Steal this fan's disguise the next time you play hooky to see a baseball game
If baseball is America's favorite pastime, then playing hooky from work to go watch baseball is right up there behind it. Let's face it -- Ferris Bueller is far from the only person to fake being sick to go catch a Cubs game.
That was the '80s, though. Skipping school is tougher than it used to be since it's so much easier to access video footage.
Ferris narrowly avoided the bad luck of being spotted by Principal Rooney on TV while the game was happening, but if Rooney had the ability to pause and rewind while watching it later on at home, Ferris would have been caught. In 2019, you need a better plan if want to risk a daytrip to Wrigley Field (or anywhere, for that matter).
Enter this brilliant fan at Thursday's Giants-Pirates game.
When you told your boss that you're sick. pic.twitter.com/NueS9rp1Zu— Subscribe to Cut4 on YouTube!!!! (@Cut4) September 12, 2019
Genius. By covering your entire face and playing on your phone, no one could possibly spot you on TV unless they have a weirdly specific memory of your hands and shoulders.
This look might seem uncomfortable at first if it's not cold outside, but even in September, it can get hot at the ballpark in the afternoon and this will also help protect you from the sun. If it's good enough to protect Rey on Jakku in "Star Wars," then it's good enough for you, too.
Whoever this mystery fan is, I salute her. She's doing a favor to all the slackers around the world who play hooky to go to a ballgame.
Ferris Bueller helped innovate the craft. This fan has perfected it.
Andrew Mearns is a writer for Cut4 whose baseball obsession was born from the shattered dreams of Mike Mussina's perfect game attempt in 2001. He has a startling memory of World Series highlights that barely functions as a party trick.