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This Nationals fan wanted to trade his dad for a bat

It may not be close to the Trade Deadline yet, but the Nationals are already giving signs that they'll be wheeling and dealing. 
OK, so it's actually a Nationals fan who wants to make a deal. He wants to trade his dad. For a bat.

I mean, if it's a Bryce Harper bat (as he indicates with the No. 34), there could be potential for a ton of dingers that I guess you could hit with it. But also, it's your dad. Trading dad for a piece of wood could come back to hurt you or haunt you at future family gatherings. 
"Where's your dad, Connor?"
"Oh, I traded him for this bat 10 years ago at a Nationals-Marlins game," you say, patting the lumber awkwardly as it sits next to you at the dining room table.
Meanwhile, your dad is locked up in some clubhouse for all eternity.

I don't know, doesn't seem like a great situation for anybody involved.