Is rhino on 'The Masked Singer' ... Barry Zito?

The evidence is mounting

March 30th, 2020

The premise of "The Masked Singer" is simple, and pretty self-explanatory: Celebrities put on ridiculous costumes to sing and dance in front of a national television audience, and that national television audience has to guess just which celebrity it is. Viewers vote for their favorite performers, and whenever someone gets voted off, they reveal their identity.

(The show originated in South Korea, which is how we got former KBO star and current Washington National Eric Thames singing K-Pop in some sort of weird skeleton b-boy outfit.)

Between performances, the celebrities cut promo videos in which they drop some hints as to who might be behind the mask. Like, for example, this one:

“Despite rising to the top of my field, I’ve struggled with constant criticism.” A friendship with a college roommate. Oblique references to surfing and the state of Missouri. On first glance, it doesn't seem like much to go on. But Grant Brisbee at The Athletic seems pretty sure: The rhino is actually former A's and Giants starter -- and current Nashville recording artist -- Barry Zito.

And honestly, his case is ... pretty compelling:

In a previous clue package, the rhino was cutting a small hamburger (or “slider”) while wearing a huge diamond ring. There’s been a clue with a guitar that had “Grand Ole Opry” inscribed on the fretboard, a reference to Zito’s time in Nashville with the A’s Triple-A affiliate. The rhinoceros was also quoted as saying, “Family is very important for success, especially when performing for a king is in your blood,” which is a reference to his parents working with Nat King Cole.

There's also the fact that the rhino certainly sounds a lot like Zito. Compare this Smokey Robinson cover:

To Zito singing the National Anthem in Oakland:

Can we say it's him beyond a shadow of a doubt? Maybe not. But the preponderance of evidence suggests that Barry Zito has been serenading America from behind a rhinoceros mask for weeks now, and isn't that something you just want to believe?