GLENDALE, Ariz. -- After all that he has been through, Alex Vesia looked rather like his usual self when he took the mound at Camelback Ranch for the first time this spring. But every day, he and his wife, Kayla, carry the memory of their late newborn daughter, Sterling Sol, who passed away in October.
The baseball world has rallied around the Vesia family. Dodgers and Blue Jays relievers showed their support by wearing his No. 51 on their caps during the World Series. Fans have cheered him loudly on the Spring Training practice fields. And when he tossed a scoreless inning in his spring debut during the Dodgers' 3-0 win over the Mariners on Monday, the Camelback Ranch crowd -- and Vesia's teammates in the home dugout -- rose to their feet in appreciation.
“It’s been hard, actually. Hard in a good way," Vesia said. "Because I want to interact with the fans and all that, but I know I have a job to do. Even on the backfields the first day, we walk out the doors and [there are] cheers and lots of love. It means a lot to myself, and Kay, too.”
Vesia has been upfront about how challenging it has been to lose a child not long after welcoming her into the world. The task of preparing himself for the upcoming season has helped him look forward, rather than dwell on the past. He said that putting in work in the gym was one source of "mental clarity" in the offseason.
At Dodgers camp, Vesia has seemingly continued to take joy from the little moments of spring baseball. He's even brought his trademark energy to live sessions, letting out an exuberant "Yeah!" when striking out Shohei Ohtani on a backfield last week.
"I think baseball players … are pretty good at compartmentalizing, but obviously that's something certainly hard to do," manager Dave Roberts said. "But I do think that getting back to the work in the weight room and throwing bullpens and preparing for the season, I do think that there's some therapy in that."
Therapy in the literal sense has also helped Vesia along in the healing process. Earlier in the spring, he spoke about how talking through his loss has made a difference, as difficult as it has been. That day, when Vesia delivered a six-minute statement to the media, he was visibly emotional, taking deep breaths to keep his composure.
That is the other side of the elation Vesia shows on the mound. Through the highs and the lows, he freely wears his emotions on his sleeve. His teammates are around to see both sides, and the support they've offered him has meant the world.
"I think I said in my statement, being around the guys has been real comforting," Vesia said. "We’ve had multiple conversations, and guys are asking me questions, just trying to feel for me. That’s honestly been a blessing. I do like talking about it with the guys. I don’t want them to feel like they can’t, because to share those important moments and whatnot -- these guys are my brothers. I truly do love all of them."
Vesia will pay tribute to his daughter this season by using gloves with his daughter's name and birthdate stitched on them, Kayla shared in a Jan. 15 TikTok.
The Dodgers are doing their best to understand what Vesia is going through. Through it all, from the inconsequential spring games to the contests that matter later on, they are by his side. And they may have appreciated what the Camelback Ranch fans did for Vesia nearly as much as he did.
"That guy has [gone] through things that you'd never wish on your worst enemy," said catcher Dalton Rushing, who caught Vesia on Monday. "The guy that he is, the character that he carries, it's impressive. You can't ask a lot of men on this earth to go out and do the things that he does after something like that happening."