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Tigers Host SpongeBob SquarePants Night

This isn’t a joke: it’s SpongeBob SquarePants Night in Detroit tonight. Listen, I’m not going to sit here and pretend I’m too cool for SpongeBob because I’m not. Nobody is. Show me one person who dislikes SpongeBob, and I’ll show you a liar. Top five greatest cartoons of all time. They’ve got SpongeBob on the field, and they’re giving away these wristbands that I want/need.

Never wanted to be in Detroit more than I do right this second.